Celebrate Farm & Ranch Moms

As we reflect on the women who raised us this Mother’s Day, South Dakota Farmers Union would like to celebrate the many women who support the state’s No. 1 industry – farm and ranch moms!

Read on to learn about Shelly Kenzy of Gregory and Darcie Lee of De Smet.

Shelly Kenzy, Gregory

One of the many ways the Kenzy family spends time together is gathering at the family farm.

“Our sons live, eat and breathe the farm, and when our daughter, Brooklynn, is home from college the farm is where she wants to spend time too,” said Shelly of her children- Brooklynn, 21; Nick, 18; and Tyler, 17. “George is great about finding a project for us all to work on as a group – whether it’s feeding calves, working cows or moving them from one pasture to the next.”

It’s always been this way, she said. Even though Shelly and her husband, George, have their home in town, 25 miles from the farm where George and his brother, Brett, raise crops, cattle and operate a feedlot together – when the kids were little, the farm is where Shelly and the kids would spend their days.

“Some of the best memories were the weeks spent staying with George’s parents at the farm when the kids were younger. It was and always will be their favorite place to be,” Shelly said.

Shelly made the decision to leave her career as a dental assistant and stay at home with her children when she was expecting her second child. She was able to do that until their school years.

“I don’t think people realize how unique farm life is,” Shelly said. “The kids get to work with their dad, they gain respect for the land and animals. It teaches them responsibility, respect and independence. They learn to do things for themselves.”

For example, Nick and Tyler are currently replacing the engine in George’s 1991 Dodge. “Farm life opens so many opportunities and doors for them. It gives them so many experiences they would not have otherwise.”

To expand their children’s experiences, when Shelly and George went somewhere, they always brought their children. “We had our kids with us all the time, whether it’s a funeral, meeting, public event or a Farmers Union Fly-In in Washington, D.C. It taught them how to deal with real life things early on and understand how to behave in all kinds of environments.”

Growing up, Shelly said, “I always knew I wanted to be a mom, turns out it’s been the most rewarding job I’ve ever had.”

Shelly grew up in rural Wyoming and met George as a child. “Our moms went to school together and were friends,” she explained. “We would come back nearly every summer to Gregory for the Fourth of July. I remember George actually pulled us on a trailer behind a 4-wheeler in the parade each year.”

They reconnected in their late 20s. “I hadn’t seen him for about 10 years. As they say, the rest is history,” Shelly said.

When their youngest, Tyler, started kindergarten, Shelly returned to work for the school. Today, she is the Gregory Elementary School Administrative Assistant. “I love my job. I love getting to know all the kids and their families,” Shelly said.

Working in the school gives Shelly the unique opportunity to be around her children and their friends all through the day.

She makes it a priority to stay close to her children as they get older. “I enjoy not only being their mom but also their friend. I stay very honest with them,” she said. “We talk about everything all the time.”

She also likes to stay up until they get home, because she wants to hear about their day. “As they come in, they’re still full of energy, and we end up having some of our best talks at night. It’s important for me to stay connected with my children as they grow.”

As their children look to their future, the farm remains important to them. “Continuing the family legacy means so much to George and his family and, the farm means the world to me. We know it is important.,” Shelly said. “And whatever happens, we know when they do return to the farm, they will take care of it and be good stewards of the land and livestock.”

Darcie Lee, De Smet

Growing up on her family’s De Smet farm, Darcie “Cronkhite” Lee developed a strong appreciation for her family’s farm legacy.

“From a young age, I remember hearing, ‘whatever you do, don’t sell the land. Do what you can so you don’t have to sell the land.’”

However, at the time, Darcie did not see herself being the one to help continue this legacy. “I very much did not want to come back to the farm. I wanted to live in the city. But I knew that would not happen if Rob and I were to stay together.”

Rob and Darcie both grew up on Kingsbury County farms. The couple was high school sweethearts, and about the time she started nursing school at South Dakota State University, Darcie decided she would rather marry Rob than move to the city.

They got married 2010, shortly before Rob deployed to Afghanistan for a year with the Army National Guard’s 211th Engineering Company.

At the time, Darcie still had two years of nursing school left to complete. “Having children was always part of our end goal. We come from good families and have good parents, but we married young, and we both had things we wanted to do in our careers before we headed down that path.”

Six years later, when the time was right, Darcie said even though she was working as a labor and delivery nurse, before their son, Everett, was born, she was terrified. “No one knows what they are doing when they become a brand new mom. Whether you have an infant or adopt an 8-year-old, there are a lot of unknowns. I encourage new moms to ask for help, advocate for themselves and find people who can help you when you need it.”

Darcie shares this advice, because as a working mom, she says she relies on her village quite a bit. Today, Everett is 9 and his two sisters, Rosene and Esme, are 6 and 2.

As their family has expanded, so have Darcie’s professional responsibilities. She is the Director of Clinical Operations for Horizon Healthcare.

“There are times, like planting or harvest or when Rob is traveling and after work I need to shuffle kids to three different parts of the county, so I use my village a lot. We are lucky because our moms help, and we have a good network of aunts who like our kids and enjoy spending time with them.”

Reflecting on where they get to raise their children, Darcie said she is grateful it’s on the farm.

“I like to watch their imagination. That is what I remember from growing up on the farm. I would go on adventures in the trees or play with the cats. Our 6-year-old Rosie will put on her adventure hat and grab her backpack and go out into the yard somewhere. Or Everett will go climb through the trees or take his BB gun and shoot at birds. On the farm, I don’t have to worry about them much.”

Everett and Rosie are also responsible for taking care of the laying hens and alpaca chores. “The farm is a great place for them to learn responsibility.”

Although Darcie’s career does not allow her the time to be too involved with day-to-day farm work, she enjoys the opportunity to help Rob with planning for the farm’s future.

“What I like best about our relationship is we do a lot of talking about future plans and how we will get to where we want to be. Rob will bring out spreadsheets and explain where he wants to be in three or five years and then together, we work backward to figure out how to get there.”

Because farm hours can get quite long depending on the season or the project, Darcie said she has learned to parent independently when she needs to. And make time to spend with her girlfriends.

“I always knew it was important to take care of me, but to actually do it is tough. Sometimes I would feel selfish taking time to be with my girlfriends, but then I realize, it is good for my mental health, and it is good for our kids to see us taking care of ourselves.”

And because her career is demanding, Darcie said she is intentional about leaving her work stress at work. “I make time to exercise when I get home. Even if it is just for 20 minutes. I get home. Rob and I talk about our day and then I put in my earbuds and go workout for 20 minutes. I come back a much better mom.”

Over time, Rob and Darcie’s farm has expanded. Together, they own some crop ground, Rob farms with his dad, Roger, and recently, when Darcie’s dad, David, was ready to retire, they began leasing his crop acres.

“There was no one else on my side of the family and the transition from my dad to Rob has been more than what we could have asked for. Dad has jumped on it and we have nothing but gratitude for him taking us in and giving us this opportunity,” Darcie said. “Nothing was handed to us, it’s a lot of work and money, but we understand there are many who do not get this opportunity.”